New Year 2019 and Mrs. New Year 2019 set New Year’s goals

Published 9:06 am Friday, January 11, 2019

By Greg Miller © 2018
Like a newborn baby, New Year 2019 came kicking and screaming into the world.
New Year 2019 grew at lightning speed and, before most humans could count to 50, he was already half the size of 2018 by the 10th day of January, his birthday month.
Like many of his human goal-setting counterparts, New Year 2019 set a few goals for himself. He grinned broadly as he penned his first resolution, “I want to be much better than last year’s version of myself.”
Mrs. New Year 2019 smiled at New Year 2019. “Don’t worry, dear,” she beamed. “Your new self is always much better than the previous version of yourself.”
“I do work pretty hard at it,” New Year 2019 boasted modestly. “Unlike most humans, however, I see the importance of actually following through and accomplishing my goals.”
Mrs. New Year 2019 reminded New Year 2019 of one very important fact. “Remember,” she said, “that the number one reason you achieve most of your goals is that you ask for the Lord’s help in achieving them.”
“The Sovereign Lord is my senior partner,” New Year 2019 confessed. “Without His help, I’d fail just like many human beings do.”
New Year 2019 then shared his number two goal: “I plan to work hard at helping people make better use of their time, so they can accomplish more of their goals.”
Mrs. New Year 2019 was a Master Time User, and she dearly loved her husband, so she offered to assist him with his second goal. “I’ll take a short vacation, but not to just sit around and do nothing. I’ll travel around the world, offering suggestions to people about how they can accomplish more of their goals.”
Suddenly, a light bulb lit up inside Mrs. New Year 2019’s head. “I have another idea,” she announced. “During my vacation, I’ll disguise myself as a human and go on a few airplane, train and bus rides, and offer some suggestions in person.”
“Great!” grinned New Year 2019. “I will greatly appreciate your help. By the way, do you plan to make any resolutions?”
“Actually, I only made one resolution, and I’ve already completed the job!”
“You have?” asked a surprised New Year 2019. “What was it?”
“I resolved to get you to allow me to help you fulfill at least one of your new year’s resolutions, and you’ve already agreed to that assistance. So all I have to do now is follow through on my promise and help some people with their resolutions, then I’m finished with my resolutions for the year!”
“Then what?”
“Then I’ll take a vacation!”
To contact the writer of this column about speaking engagements (in the U.S.), including Christian Comedy Fundraising Outreaches, Christian Creativity Seminars and/or puppet ministry, please email kidcool4jesus@yahoo.com, raysofson@gmail.com or ministry4jesus@yahoo.com, with “Rays of Son” or “Request Speaking Engagement” in the subject line.

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