Disconnect regarding faith may herald couple’s demise

Published 8:49 am Thursday, February 4, 2021

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DEAR ABBY: I have been dating this guy seriously for a year. We have talked about marriage and we were even looking at rings. Due to certain recent events, I have come to realize that my hope for his Christianity to grow stronger is probably never going to happen. I love this man with all my heart, but I also need a husband who will pray with me, have a heart for God, who will want to go to church and make decisions by praying and leaning on God.
We have talked about this and what my needs are, but he’s not sure if he will get there. Do I hold on and hope through my actions and life, he will learn how to walk with God fully, or should I let him go and try to find someone else? — BROKENHEARTED BELIEVER

DEAR BELIEVER: If you can’t accept this man just the way he is, let him go. You shouldn’t marry anyone hoping to change him because it wouldn’t be fair to either of you. If faith is your No. 1 priority, it would be better for both of you if you look further for a life partner.
DEAR ABBY: My friend “Gina” and I have known each other for many years. The other day she got into a heated discussion on Facebook with several other people we’ve known for years. It was about politics. When I read her post, I was shocked. She belittled and bullied those who didn’t share her opinion. I have since deleted my FB account because I don’t want to see such hatred. What do I tell her when she asks why I’m no longer on social media? — SOCIAL MEDIA DISTANCED

DEAR SOCIAL: Tell Gina the truth. Say you deleted your account because you were shocked when you saw people with differing political opinions being bullied and demeaned, which you found shocking and offensive. If she’s foolish enough to push you for more detail, tell her how her post affected you. It’s shameful that adults in this day and age cannot calmly discuss their differences without resorting to those tactics.
DEAR ABBY: I am torn between two guys. I have known the first guy for a year, and we had some ups and downs. Six months ago he had a heart attack, but he pulled through, thank God. But since then, things have been very hard. Our relationship went sour and we broke up.
I met the second guy online a month ago. He seems very sweet and down to earth and treats me like a princess. The first guy and I ended up talking again, and the problem is, I’m still in love with him. I think both of them are wonderful and I don’t know what decision to make. Please help me. — CHOICES, CHOICES IN DELAWARE

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DEAR CHOICES: Before making any decision, it’s important you fully understand why your relationship with Guy No. 1 went sour after his heart attack. Could it be related to his near-death experience? You need to have all the facts before jumping back into a romance with him.
You haven’t known Guy No. 2 long enough to really know who he is yet. Do not pull the plug on this one until you have more answers than you were able to put in your letter to me.
Dear Abby is written by Abigail Van Buren, also known as Jeanne Phillips, and was founded by her mother, Pauline Phillips. Contact Dear Abby at www.DearAbby.com or P.O. Box 69440, Los Angeles, CA 90069.
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